Bedroom Voyeurism

Posted on January 3, 2012 by The Dame

I was doing a think this morning and I realised my bedroom/office was looking pretty so I took some pictures of it…

I am planning on finally visiting Paris for my birthday in February. I didnt make it last year so I didnt get round to reading the books I got on Paris. Now I will. On top of the books is a Desert Rose Crystal.

Desert Rose: A gypsum. Lt. brown. Gently grounding; clarifies thinking and mental vision, perception. Quiets worry, brings out practicality. (Related to Selenite.) Quiets the mind. Used to access past/future lives, assists in bring material persuits related to business. Provides flexibility to one’s nature, strengthens decisions, align the spinal column and removes energy blockage. Stabilizes epileptic disorders.

For christmas my mom bought me this funny 2012 diary. On the cover it says “sieze the afternoon” (Im hardly every up before 11am) and inside it has little quips like, “cleaned bathroom. Will never let it get dirty again”. Also, a rubber sleeve for my iPhone is essential because I have “spaz hands” – a nickname I got when I was a waitress once. Before I broke all the crockery… Seriously, its like my hands get bored while Im holding something!

My car key has it’s own chain and always gets laughs when I take it into the garage. Someone said it’s a guy’s keychain, but I’m owning it.

Diptyque’s Baies scent is my favourite and I always have one of their candles. They are expensive but they last for ages. I found this La Perla fragrance while asking for directions in their store in New York, it’s called J’aime. Yes, those are red sequinned pasties, to remind me to do this custom fetish video for someone who has a thing for them… The watch is by Guess and quiet large, I only ever wear it when Im leaving the house and often take it off because it sticks to my arm and that bugs me.

This is my favourite of the three Tretchikoff mugs I got for christmas from one of my fetish clients. She is resting on my passport which is encased in a rad travel map cover and thats resting on my Paris “research” books.

This is my bedside table except its at the end of my bed because the way my room is shaped means my bed is wedged into an alcove of sorts where there is no space for the bedside table to go alongside the bed. I got these speakers for christmas from another client of mine and they are constantly playing music. He also sent me the Mason Pearson hairbrush which I love but think is grossly overpriced – glad I didnt pay for it! I also have a collection of feathered earrings. Bumble and Bumble’s Thickening Spray is awesome if you have fine hair like I do!

This is my dresser. Im slowly collecting prints of my favourite artists but in the meantime, some of them exist as a print off from the internet. The framed prints are by Rik Lee which you will know if you are a regular reader. The smaller framed print with the skull rosary hanging on it is by Amy Duncan who is a tattoo artist in Melbourne, Australia. To her right is a piece by famous pinup artist of the 1950′s, Alberto Vargas. This image is always striking to me whenever I see it and when the pound shop (dollar store to those across the pond) gets new black frames in, she will be framed. I dont know who did the stilettos in the other picture, but I will probably have them tattooed one day.

The apple and the Russian Doll cats are from my mother. She bought them on a cruise around Russia. The apple has a Gustav Klimt picture on it, he is another artist I love. The card on the left I got at the Erotica exhibition in London last year. It’s by a lady who does beautiful erotic wrapping paper and printed plates. The bottle in the back was a bottle of cider and I just loved the pinup design!

These are my anti-depressants. I am all for natural treatment of ailments and since I was on anti-depressants for two years and just become numb and emotionless, I recently came off them. I do a lot of research into treating ourselves holistically and naturally. Zinc deficiency has been linked to depression in women. So now I take 100mg a day with the 5HTP and feel a hundred times better!

I have been so out of touch with my natural creativity due to depression and the resulting medication. I have now stocked up on coloured markers and crayons for drawing with! Next to my Macbook is my new A4 notebook which has become essential to me. Atop of that is my iPad2 which was given to me last christmas. It is covered in a GelaSkin print by Colin Thompson which is a very colourful image of a quirky bookshelf. I mostly play Zynga games (I play Dream Zoo and Forestville because Ive finished Cityville which took me MONTHS.) and watch BBC programs (Escape To The Country) on it.

My room is small, so I had nowhere to put all my shoes, my then boyfriend bought this bookshelf for me from a thrift store and it now houses all my books and shoes. I read all kinds of things. Here you can see books by Dr Jonathan Wright who is a Nutritional Therapist and very very forward thinking when it comes to healing the body naturally. I also got the Gerson Therapy book because people close to me have cancer and I wanted to know more about this cancer cure by diet program. Those are fake Louboutins I found in a designer thrift store in Ipswich and Cats is my favourite musical theatre. I still remember the first time I saw it and the feeling that I belonged on the stage. I guess the internet has become my stage now Im also into self sufficient living, feminism and food!

I think this picture is hilarious because of the juxtaposition of the philosophy book and the conga dancing skeleton… That skeleton has a freaking skirt on with it’s hands on it’s hips and when you press the button the conga plays and it freaking dances. It instantly puts me in a good mood. I still havent read the Nietzsche book…

Every pair of shoes have a story dont they? Those brown ones are YSL rip offs and they are so comfortable. I once spent 3 straight hours dancing maniacally in a Breaks club in them and they handled perfectly. The scarf is purple and grey with skulls on. The leopard print peeptoes look amazing when my toes are painted red and are a favourite with my foot fetish customers.

These clear 5 inch heels are my favourite. Especially when I am doing foot fetish webcam because they show off my feet while keeping them in a sexy arch. I guess you can take the girl out of the strip club but you cant take the strip club out of the girl… The red strappy fetish heels were a gift from a customer.

These red heels are my absolute favourite. Ive never worn these purple lace shoes I just like the way they look. I totally need to dust my book/shoe shelf!

I recently bought ballet shoes. Real ones. For doing ballet in. I found a local adult ballet class and I cant wait to start. I did ballet up until I was 7yrs old, I was totally crap at it. I could never remember the french names of movements beyond the plié and one teacher got mad at me because my back is always curved. It’s not, I just have a really round ass!

More fetish heels that were gifts. The ones in the foreground are impossible to walk in if you dont have flexible ankles but they are very very sexy looking. The studded ones in the back are painful to wear but my customers love them.

Wedges are the way forward, seriously. For some reason stiletto heels just dont support you enough. Wedges can be worn longer. I never wear these haha. But then I live in a town where wearing heels is dressing up… The booties in the back are so done. I wore them while performing in a rock burlesque group I was in and the heels are shot.

My black boots collection. At the back are suede wedge boots which I love wearing because they give my 5’6 frame height. But the flat biker boots I wear All.The.Time. Comfortable and easy to slip on and run out the door. Then come a pair of impossibly uncomfortable stiletto fetish boots made famous by Lady Gaga, I only ever wear them if a customer has a boot fetish. The knackered boots in the front are my thigh high boots which I wore when I was a stripper because I was that badass rock-chick stripper in a tartan miniskirt and a mischievous scowl that spat in your drink while waving my ass in your face.

I could stare at this picture forever…

What are your favourite things about your bedroom? What do you wish you had in your bedroom?

Why Im My Own Boss

Posted on January 2, 2012 by The Dame

(Source)

One day in my early twenties after years of working desk jobs in the corporate world I asked myself “when do I get to do what I want to do?”.

I realised that 90% of my time and money is going to someone else. Someone faceless, someone who doesnt feel like they’re playing fair. What about me?

All my friend’s around me kept telling me that “that’s just how life is” and “you just make the best of your lot”, but I couldnt help feeling that I wasnt put on this earth to be some kind of human machine on an endless treadmill designed by a society I was completely out of touch with in my heart.

(Source)

I have been fired from or have left every single job I have ever had. I would reach such an unbearable level of anxiety that I simply had to get out. From the benign small talk to the rigid protocols that never seemed to make sense, I was slowly dying inside.

I began to fantasise that I would just get up from my desk and walk right out of that life. Eventually I did. I walked out of a Personal Assistant job to four Financial Directors at a very large Telecommunications company. (Ugh, I get shudders just writing such a boring sentence!)

I had no idea where I was going or what I was going to do next, I just knew that I couldn’t slowly commit suicide this way.

That was close to ten years ago and I am still discovering what Im made of and what my gift to the world is. I think Im finally on the right path in the right town metaphorically speaking. I went to Strip City, Disco Land and Horse Country (more on those another time) and all kinds of things in between trying my best to stay away from the black hole that was work wear and filing cabinets.

I currently scavenge an income, sometimes doing fetish phone calls or webcam (boring is clearly not my thing!) and sometimes asking my mom to help pay my bills. Ive never felt happier. I LOVE writing for this site. I LOVE going on adventures to develop content for this site. I KNOW I will eventually make an income online doing what I love, Ive seen it in my mind for a long time. I can FEEL that Im on the right path.

And yes, there are times where it gets so bad financially that I start thinking I should go and get a “real job”, but then the panic attacks start and I know that’s not the right decision and that I am not practicing The Art of Just.

(Source)

Honouring my heart has been the greatest gift I have ever given myself. It has made me stronger and inspired countless other people who follow my journey online.

I may not have much in the way of financial stability, yet, but I am at peace with myself and the world in as far as my daily existence goes and I am enjoying every new day that brings new opportunities to learn and grow closer to my true purpose.

There is now a whole industry dedicated to helping you break free of the confines of a stifling corporate job. These people do it best: Chris Guillebeau | The Art of Non-Conformity, Escape from Cubicle Nation. Read the first of many to come interviews I’ve held with people leading unconventional lives here.

Are you your own boss? Do you wish to be? What’s it like for you being in charge and what do you think it will take for you to step into that role? Let us know in the comments below and stay tuned for my story on what stepping out of the status quo has taught me.

Looking Back At 2011

Posted on December 22, 2011 by The Dame

My 2011 Highlights

Meeting Jethro and our 6 months of an awesome relationship full of love, laughter and lessons.
Giving up drinking for the month of July.
Starting this website!
Visiting New York for my birthday and getting to meet and hang out with Jasmin of VintageVandalizm.com.
Attending the Torture Garden Valentines Ball with awesome close friends and meeting Justin of Follow2Square as well as having an extraordinary night out!
Attending The Secret Garden Party as a Lifeguard and getting to experience the fantastical world of this unique festival and take some awesome photos!
Moving in to a rad house with my good friend Katey and filming My Drunk Pizza after a night out on the tiles as well as just about every day which is full of food and laughter (and some tears) and of course our Big Boy.
Spending a week at a low impact off-grid community in Wales to experience the lifestyle and spending time with some wonderful people and animals.
Attending my good friend’s beautiful hand-made wedding.
Performing as part of Rock Burlesque group Midnight Candy to raise money for breast cancer.

Little things that rocked my world this year:

* beach walks with my neighbour’s dog * fresh organic local farm produce delivered to my door each week * getting a car * painting my toenails purple and glitter making them look like disco toes * getting down filled pillows – dreamy! * adding a memory foam mattress topper to my bed * living with three siamese cats – amazing! * my best friend in Australia visiting * growing my hair long * suntanning topless in our backyard * buying a longboard skateboard and bombing a hill with my boyfriend * running in the forest * camping in the forest * walking in an unknown pitch dark forest with just a headlamp to guide us * lots of time spent in nature * installing a wooden floor with just hand tools * hanging out with four wild horses in a field * receiving many free gifts incl. a Macbook Pro, DSLR camera and iPad2 * care packages from my mom * starting my collection of Rik Lee prints * fancy dress! * cooking! * 2 Broke Girls / Sons of Anarchy / Breaking Bad / The Big Bang Theory / True Blood / Hart of Dixie * Taking kelp to stop my hair falling out / Taking bee propolis to finally end my acne! * dark chocolate * vanilla lattés * having my underarms waxed – MUCH better than shaving! * learning about nutritional therapy * being in a loving and fun relationship * photographing everything * my housemate’s home made pizza *

What were the highlights of YOUR year? Let us know in the comments!

My Favourite Photographs Taken In 2011

Posted on December 18, 2011 by The Dame

Im thinking about turning some of these into a 2012 calendar with inspiring messages edited onto them and within the days of the calendar, would you support my site by buying one? Let me know in the comments!

My 2012 Bucket List Vision Board

Posted on December 16, 2011 by The Dame

Get more tattoos, namely Xena the Warrior Princess, Mae West and Juliette Lewis.

Visit another country, hopefully meet Leslie of Purple-ish Boots.

Earn a living from this website.
Take ballet classes.
Surf warm waters.

Write an e-book.
Take up painting.

Take singing lessons.
Get involved in amateur dramatics.
Volunteer locally.
Become accredited in some way as a healer/leader.
Meet one of my heros.
Learn an aerial art.

Accomplish financial stability.
Create a passive stream of income.
Go to a comedy night once a month.
Plant and harvest a food garden.

Donate to good people who need it.
Ride a horse with no saddle or bridle.

Crafty Task For You!

Browse the internet (Tumblr or Pinterest is a good place to start!), or magazines for pictures that really speak to you and make your heart sing, print them out, cut them up and stick them to a cork board or on your bedroom or office wall above your desk, then send me a photograph of your 2012 Vision Board for my next post featuring your very own vision boards! Include a few words on the things you want to experience in 2012. I cant wait to see them!

What would you like to experience and accomplish in 2012? Let us know in the comments!

This Week, I Am Currently Lovin’

Posted on June 3, 2011 by The Dame

My man's idea of breakfast in bed

My considerate, thoughtful, generous, giving, funny, good looking, loving, open minded, great listener boyfriend who takes fabulous care of me and feeds me great food while supporting my dreams and listening to me navigate it all as I go along. Thank you Universe.
Being in the countryside, walks in the woods and fields, drives past endless paddocks of horses, sheep and cows, quaint old English homes collected in bends and valleys along our road trip journeys. The feeling of total content I get when I’m surrounded by countryside.
Catching up with friends from South Africa all week which has involved lots of bi-lingual language talking, joke telling and laughing, eating traditional South African food like “pap en wors” (corn meal and sausages made South African style) with sauces from back home. Watching South African comedy DVDs. Talking about the changes back home, good and bad. Advice from friends I’ve known for years.
Swollen period boobs – while painful, fun to marvel at!
Sunshine and warmth for a change!

The Books That Changed My Life

Posted on May 23, 2011 by The Dame

(Image Credit)

Becoming a (free) woman

Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl – A Woman’s Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship
I have bought this book for every single one of my girl friends and recommend it to every woman. A few have told me this is common knowledge to them, lucky girls, but for me, it wasn’t and it changed my life. I learned how and WHY to respect myself, what behaviour to put up with and generally how to be an awesome chick. This book is like having a deep and meaningful with your older sister, its funny and a fast read.
Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts: How to Use the Power of Pleasure
Some may be put off by her very cutesy kind of talk, she is very enthusiastic, but what she has to say is gold. She also does a book called Mama Gena’s Owner’s and Operator’s Guide to Men, which is hilarious and valuable.
The Surrendered Single: A Practical Guide to Attracting and Marrying the Right Man for You
I read this many years ago, but what I remember from it is to let men be men, i.e. when they offer the door, to carry something for you, help you move something, say yes/thank you. Positive acknowledgement encourages continued good behaviour.
The Dance of the Dissident Daughter: A Woman’s Journey from Christian Tradition to the Sacred Feminine (Plus)
This is written by a devout Christian lady who slowly learned how many of the christian teachings subjugated women and this is her journey to discovering her power as a woman, not as a christian. Very interesting.
The Art of Sensual Female Dominance
While this is aimed at women/couples into Dominance/submission in their relationships, it has some very valuable information about the power of women. It was a real eye opener for me and I am all for helping women realise just how powerful they are!
Wacky Chicks: Life Lessons from Fearlessly Inappropriate and Fabulously Eccentric Women
An hilarious read, one Ive just bought again on Kindle as I think I sold the last copy I had to afford a trip to Australia, but the author profiles unconventional, unusual and eccentric women and their lives. A must read for anyone who feels like they fit into that category and for people who love this site!
Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman’s Search for Everything
Moving from my 20′s into my 30′s is a sort of coming of age and this book came at the right time and is one that wont hurt reading more than once. I related to a lot of what she was experiencing and the way she explains things really enlightens and comforts women.

Diet

Animal, Vegetable, Miracle: Our Year of Seasonal Eating
The Omnivore’s Dilemma: The Search for a Perfect Meal in a Fast-food World
In Defence of Food: The Myth of Nutrition and the Pleasures of Eating: An Eater’s Manifesto
The PH Miracle: Balance Your Diet, Reclaim Your Health
Any books about diet and food are a must read. Too many of us don’t understand where our food comes from and what is put in it and how this affects us.

Lifestyle

Last American Man
A biography of an amazing man who grew up in the forest out the back of his home and became someone completely connected to nature who’s mission is to teach the world about nature and remind us of our deep connection to it.
Radical Simplicity: Creating an Authentic Life
An autobiography by a man who felt driven to live simply in various self-made abodes in forests and fields and the lessons he learned on his journey. A joyful, quick read with illustrations by the author. If you loved Thoreau’s Walden, you will love this (also its not so convoluted!)
How to Live Off-grid
Currently reading, but being a bit of a hippie myself, the idea of living disconnected from the electrical and water grid, and therefor, not under government/tax man thumb to an extent, excites me. The author buys a live-in van and travels the United Kingdom meeting people who live off-grid and imparts the lessons he learned on the way.
The Moneyless Man: A Year of Freeconomic Living
Another current read. The author decides, for various reasons that he explains, to live a year without money. He is not allowed to earn or spend any money, living self-sufficiently and with limited help from others. A very interesting read that opens the mind to exactly what we need to survive and how different life is when we aren’t spending and living to work.
The Secret
I’m always surprised when I meet people who have never heard of this famous book. It teaches the Law of Attraction which is understanding that our thoughts become our reality and the power of this and how to wield this power for a good life.
Think and Grow Rich
The precursor to The Secret written many years ago, every time I read this book, good things happen in my life.
Out of it: A Cultural History of Intoxication
The book that helped me renounce organised religion. It probably wont do the same for you, that’s not its intention, but I was thinking a lot of things about being christian back then and how it tied into being a human and so on, and this book just enlightened me. The book is about the history of intoxication, from roots and plants in BC ages to nicotine, alcohol and party drugs in these ages.
How To Win Friends And Influence People
A famous book by Dale Carnegie, this book should be read in high school. In valuable tips on how to make people feel comfortable and liked and in turn win friends and influence people. TIP: People love the sound of their own name, use it!

Id love to know what books have made a big change in your life, let us know in the comments!

I Am So Grateful For…

Posted on May 18, 2011 by The Dame

(Bromance)

Always having cats in my life who teach me the art of living in the moment and unconditional love
Friends and family who are always there for me no matter what – and are way cheaper than therapy!
The ocean, sunshine and spring wild flowers to remind me everyday what a beautiful planet we inhabit
My warm and comfortable double bed in my safe and warm house
Despite an extremely inconsistent income, always having healthy, fresh food in the fridge
Other bloggers who lead by example and enlighten me on a daily basis as well as inspiring my own writing
Being aware how powerful being grateful is. When I forget to be grateful for everything, my life falls apart, but when I am mindful everyday of the blessings in my life, I gain more blessings!
Having the opportunity to impart wisdom, inspire and lead by example, in turn making a positive difference in the lives of others
Yoga and Pilates that sneakily seem like an easy workout from the outside but in fact kick my butt way harder than you would expect – hello triceps!
Difficult times that test me and help me to grow
Good men who are generous, thoughtful, open, listen, provide for and protect
Close knit communities where everyone supports one another
The rise of women in society, in films, in business, in general awareness
People who make an effort to take care of the planet and teach and inspire others to do the same
Dreams and aspirations
Hugs and cuddles
Children who remind us to be care-free, curious and a little bit mischievous

What are the top three things in your life you are most grateful for?

Things To Do This Summer!

Posted on May 9, 2011 by The Dame

+ Get a ticket / Go to Secret Garden Party with my man and my friends!

+ Buy my friend’s old surfboard and re-learn to surf!

+ Get a longboard skateboard and learn how to skate it!

+ Do some sort of adventure activity such as Coasteering or hang-gliding or throwing myself out of a plane, or Zorbing!

+ Go on a long horse ride!

+ Actually get a tan…

+ Get a new tattoo

+ Explore more of Cornwall and Devon

+ Go Camping!

+ Learn to play the guitar for the many beach bonfires that will be had!

+ Skinny dip!

What other things can you suggest we do this summer? Let us know in the comments lovelies!

Midnight Candy Alternative Burlesque – First Show!

Posted on May 4, 2011 by The Dame

Well, the date finally came around! And what a night it was! Emma, our leading lady, organised a charity event including a raffle draw with prizes from local businesses as well as her husband’s band to play and lots of performances from us, Midnight Candy, as well as the dance company she is a part of. (You can see our showreels here)

The night was a success! We had a couple professional photographers snapping us both backstage and while performing as well as some group shots which came out fantastic!

Performing for the first time after only meeting 5 weeks before hand and having just one day a week to learn all the routines and rehearse, I think we did a stellar job and of course we had a total riot of a time! The venue was packed and I know we blew a lot of people away in this small coastal town! I cant wait to perform again at our next event!

(My costumes!)

Here are a couple videos that my man shot, the first is part of our opening sequence and the second is my first solo performance which was thrown off a bit because there was meant to be a chair waiting for me, but I had to get it myself and I forgot the toy gun I was meant to use! But you’d never know because the show must go on!