One day in my early twenties after years of working desk jobs in the corporate world I asked myself “when do I get to do what I want to do?”.
I realised that 90% of my time and money is going to someone else. Someone faceless, someone who doesnt feel like they’re playing fair. What about me?
All my friend’s around me kept telling me that “that’s just how life is” and “you just make the best of your lot”, but I couldnt help feeling that I wasnt put on this earth to be some kind of human machine on an endless treadmill designed by a society I was completely out of touch with in my heart.
I have been fired from or have left every single job I have ever had. I would reach such an unbearable level of anxiety that I simply had to get out. From the benign small talk to the rigid protocols that never seemed to make sense, I was slowly dying inside.
I began to fantasise that I would just get up from my desk and walk right out of that life. Eventually I did. I walked out of a Personal Assistant job to four Financial Directors at a very large Telecommunications company. (Ugh, I get shudders just writing such a boring sentence!)
I had no idea where I was going or what I was going to do next, I just knew that I couldn’t slowly commit suicide this way.
That was close to ten years ago and I am still discovering what Im made of and what my gift to the world is. I think Im finally on the right path in the right town metaphorically speaking. I went to Strip City, Disco Land and Horse Country (more on those another time) and all kinds of things in between trying my best to stay away from the black hole that was work wear and filing cabinets.
I currently scavenge an income, sometimes doing fetish phone calls or webcam (boring is clearly not my thing!) and sometimes asking my mom to help pay my bills. Ive never felt happier. I LOVE writing for this site. I LOVE going on adventures to develop content for this site. I KNOW I will eventually make an income online doing what I love, Ive seen it in my mind for a long time. I can FEEL that Im on the right path.
And yes, there are times where it gets so bad financially that I start thinking I should go and get a “real job”, but then the panic attacks start and I know that’s not the right decision and that I am not practicing The Art of Just.
Honouring my heart has been the greatest gift I have ever given myself. It has made me stronger and inspired countless other people who follow my journey online.
I may not have much in the way of financial stability, yet, but I am at peace with myself and the world in as far as my daily existence goes and I am enjoying every new day that brings new opportunities to learn and grow closer to my true purpose.
There is now a whole industry dedicated to helping you break free of the confines of a stifling corporate job. These people do it best: Chris Guillebeau | The Art of Non-Conformity, Escape from Cubicle Nation. Read the first of many to come interviews I’ve held with people leading unconventional lives here.
Are you your own boss? Do you wish to be? What’s it like for you being in charge and what do you think it will take for you to step into that role? Let us know in the comments below and stay tuned for my story on what stepping out of the status quo has taught me.